Last year I was prompted to begin a study on hospitality that overwhelmed me. Whenever one gazes at a priority and value of God's and seeks, with an open heart, to understand His will and design for that virtue, they will always be amazed at His goodness and intelligence in design. Such was the case with me. So many things fell together in my study that made the vision of 'hospitality' a most glorious picture indeed. I hope to share my gleanings later, what I learned about why God loves hospitality, why He desires us to make it a way of life, how He has used it in the past, and how He can use it for His kingdom purposes beyond our imagination. In the meantime, while I am perfecting that, here's a recent topic I've been thinking about a lot. I see how hospitality is important, but how do I own this as a child at home? I've no house of my very own to use as I please. I remembered a time several years ago when my dear mother's health was failing and hospitality was overwhelmingly hard for her, and our average was about 2 families a year. Praise the Lord, she is more healthy now than I can ever remember her being in my life, but I wondered, "How could I have practiced hospitality back then?" I don't think this is a command I should ignore until I "grow up" and have my own house. Really, I want to be in the habit of intentionally practicing hospitality NOW, so it's like second nature when I grow up.
I gave it some thought, and I came up with a couple of ways children at home can still take ownership of this value of God's and start putting it into practice now.
1: Help Our Parents Host
Back when mama's health was low, the only way we could ever have anyone over was if my brothers and I did most of the work. It was unspeakably hard for her to put it all together. If you're in a similar situation, my suggestion is to pray about it - ask God to give you and your parents the desire and opportunities to host people, then bring it up and politely ask them about it. If it sounds like too much for them, offer to cook the meal and clean the house. Chances are likely that they will want you to prove yourself first, as my parents have done with me and my brothers. If so, don't get discouraged. Although it may not actually be hosting people, it's step #1. It is progress, and if you are faithful in the little things, you will also be faithful in the larger things, like actually getting to host.
#2: Treat Guests As Our Own
Mama was reading us a bedtime story. At the time, our couch happened to be right next to the front door. The doorbell rang. Mama & daddy and my brothers got up and politely walked toward the door. I hesitated, then dug myself further into the couch, hidden from sight of whoever was at the door. "Hello! Come on in!" I heard. Some friends had stopped by to drop something off. I waited for several minutes, alert, while they chatted. Then one of them started to go past the couch. I instantly stuck my head out and shouted, "boo!"
What a welcome.
Did I mention I was four?
I've had my times of wanting to run out the door and get lost in the woods when company was on their way, but a few years ago, I realized that a proactive and friendly/pleased greeting no only goes a long way toward making the guests feel welcome, but helps me with my shyness. As soon as the guests pull in the driveway, I take off my apron or empty the dust pan, etc., then head out the door. I wave, and as soon as they get out of the car, I approach them and welcome them. I smile and tell them we're happy they're here and bring them in. I do not allow myself to stay in my bedroom until they are in the house if there is any possible way to help it. When the guests take forever to get out of the car and get their things, and the hosts also take forever to come out, or don't even come out, and make the guests walk all the way up to the house, even though the greeting may be warm and caring, it's much more awkward.
Proverbs says, "Do not forsake your own friend or your father's friend." Any guests of my parents' are my guests, too. Part of owning the guests is greeting them attentively, introducing myself if necessary, and taking part in the discussions and activities.
#3: Owning Our Bedroom
Awhile ago, I declared to myself that I was queen of my bedroom. Of course, I still share the room with my sister, but I've taken the responsibility for the productivity of it. What I mean is, I've decided to use it proactively for others, not just myself. What this practically looks like is that I, as the hostess of my room, always try to keep it clean and inviting for any "guests" who should stop by. Most times, this is my family - siblings who want to read their books in MY room, tell me about their projects, and stop by for a chat. At the time I wrote this article, I was actually multi-purpose hosting. :D My room looked like a big mess, because I was hosting stacks and stacks of books taken from the shelves outside my room in the hallway while we were painting there. Even though my room was not necessarily clean because of this, I was HOSTING. I was using the space God gave me to help others out... the books had to go somewhere!
Some girls foolishly post "no boys allowed" signs on their doors, and boys vice versa. This is a very selfish perspective. Instead of dictating who is and who is not allowed into your room, why not view your room as a gift from God to you to use for His glory? Accept each sibling, parent, and friend, graciously into your room as a "guest."
Also, be intentional about the decorations you choose for your bedroom. I know some people who post posters of their favorite movies and actors and books on the wall and/or modern art. I do not want to get into a discussion about my opinions on those. All art preferences aside, I am just hoping to suggest that the art and decorations we choose can, with purposed selection, be a delight as well as encouragement and even challenge and spiritual refreshment to those who enter. What this looks like will be different for everyone. For me personally, this meant replacing movie posters (actually, I never had any) with some sweet and innocent beautiful portraits of three young girls to remind me of the beauty God programmed into womanhood for His glory, and the radiance that a life of purity can have. It meant always having some beautifully scripted Scripture verse on my chalkboard and a thought-provoking question written on my mirror, several hand-lettered Scripture verses posted around my room (walls and closet doors), thought provoking and challenging quotes posted in calligraphy on my desk, a large bouquet of fake flowers that match my bedroom colors next to a gorgeously framed Scripture verse that a friend did in graphic design for me, two pieces of artwork made out of cloth that fit my color scheme/theme and add an air of feminine loveliness to the room, and my favorite part, which I call my "station." It is a shelf on one of my bookshelves that, instead of filling with books, I've filled with specific quotes and Scripture verses that are currently challenging me. Some of them were gifts, some I did myself in calligraphy, but all are beautiful, which I think is important. I've posted these, as well as prayer lists and goal lists, all around the inside of the shelf. Whenever I want to be encouraged, or just think, I often go up to that shelf, lay my arms on it, and just gaze around at the profound and beautiful words. In any case, I specifically designed my room this way so that walking into my room will not be a neutral experience. I want everyone to leave feeling happy, having seen beauty, order, and creativity, hopefully leaving with either a pebble in their shoe, or something to think about, or another reason to praise the Lord. This is one way that children can practice using their habitation to bless and encourage others and bring glory to God.
So you see, it's mostly about having a heart of selflessness. Someone recently shared with me that if I desire to share the gospel, God will give me opportunities to. I believe it is the same with hospitality. If we have a heart that desires to be hospitable, He will show us how we can use what He has given us, even if we are children living in our parents' home.
Unless God changes their heart, the child who hides when company comes and shuts their bedroom door on certain people will grow up to be the adult who rushes home right after church services to hide out by themselves and do their own personal things that they want to do. While they may always be in the very center of their comfort zone, they will also experience loneliness and miss out on the overwhelming blessings and joys of God's design for hospitality.
~ To The Utmost Glory Of God ~