1. Say Good Morning + Good Night
Every day! Cheerily! :D
2. Get Dressed Every Morning
Put some effort into looking presentable. Looking two or three days old in your appearance sends a message that you don't care.
3. Smile At Them
Every time you catch their eye!
4. Be Sincerely Sincere
Listen to their stories and ask questions. Laugh at their jokes.
5. Learn Their Love Language
Every once in awhile, be intentional and surprise them with something pertaining to their love language. Here are some ideas:
Words Of Affirmation:
Tell them you love them, but make sure they know why.
People with this love language love notes!! Even if you just say "love ya! Thinking of you - have a great day!" and stick it in their pants pocket or leave it on their desk or in their laptop, they will soar over the moon with glee.
Grasp every opportunity that comes your way to speak well of them in front of other people... especially when they are there too.
Be careful to not say "you always" or "you never" when criticizing them. It's simply not true, and can crush their spirit, as it implies that they are always doing (insert bad thing), and never do (insert good thing.) On the flip side, developing a habit of sincerely thanking them for everything good you notice them doing will bring your relationship to a new level of general good-will between the two of you... guaranteed.
Sing together around the house! Randomly blurt in while they're in the middle of an elegant solo in the kitchen.
Physical Touch:
Going out of your way to touch them means the most. Hugs and kisses as a routine are nice, but if you walk across the room, interrupt them and give them a hug, a pat on the back, a back rub, kiss their cheek, or rub their arm for no reason, you score.
In general, they will be so happy if you make it a point to show some sort of physical affection for them at least once a day. Hug them, pat their leg, poke them in the tummy as you walk by, (if they're younger than you... : ) have a pillow fight, squeeze till it hurts, sit close, play with their hair, kiss them all over their head, or playfully slap their arm. Etc, etc.
Be careful in your demeanor towards them. Frowning, pouting, and looking peeved at them is just as bad as shoving or hitting!
Gifts:
Pick them flowers. Did they mention something they wanted/needed? Get it for them and make their week! Bring home souvenirs. Frame a photo of the two of you and give it to them. Buy them a necklace and sneak it onto a hangar in their closet. Customized mugs, y'all!
Thoughtfulness goes a long way. Thinking about what they would like or need, and wrapping it up nicely with a thoughtful note is a win.
Take advantage of the little opportunities to give. Surprise them with a treat on their desk, a gift card or money with a note in their shoe drawer or a pocket they use often. Make a smoothie, embellish it, stick a straw in it, and take it to them while they're working. (One of my younger brothers is amazing at this!)
Don't forget their birthday! (Or anniversary, etc.)
Organize a gift shower for them!
Acts Of Service:
It's great when someone was using the power tools anyway and they organized the work bench while they were there. But, if they were trying to get their bike out to go bike riding and noticed that the work bench needed organizing and did that instead, that would proclaim to someone with this love language they they are indeed (or forsooth as my brother would say : ) very valuable.
Develop eagle eyes. Make a habit of looking over their To-Do list if it's available to you. Or, just ask what they're going to do that day! Then you can tell them, "Don't worry about cleaning the bathroom. I got it covered." (And make sure you actually DO clean the bathroom!!)
Like most of the love languages, surprises are just super. But make sure you know how to do the task before trying to surprise them. You don't want to do it wrong and create more work for them.
Perhaps you could take some time to think of a way that you could make their work more organized or efficient. Organize something of theirs? Deep clean something? Is there a tool they need that they don't have yet?
Quality Time:
T-O-G-E-T-H-E-R. This is the most important part to people with this love language.
Eat as many meals as possible together.
Time is our most precious asset. Giving this to someone else is a great sacrifice, and is a clear way to proclaim that you value them - very highly.
Please, oh please, do not interrupt them. It's important to people with this love language that you listen to them and pay attention. Ask questions. Oh, please do not wander off and start doing something else, interrupt, become distracted, etc!!
It's not about just spending a ton of time with them... there's a difference between quantity and quality. You can spend a lot of time with them, while looking at your phone, becoming distracted, day-dreaming, etc., and they will not feel loved. When you're with them, give them your entire attention and
Quality conversations, hands-on good old fashioned work, exercising, cooking, walking, etc., TOGETHER are things someone with this love language will soak up.
Which of these are you excited to put into practice? Do you think I'm right about what makes people with each love language tick? Are there other things I didn't mention? What is YOUR love language? I'd love to know!
~ To The Utmost Glory Of God ~
PHOTO CREDIT: Ian TenHaken